Refugia as a Place of Emotional Healing
by Victoria Stanley for Dr. Joshua King’s ENG 4365: Literature and Environmental Justice Class, Fall 2025
Welcome
Victoria here! Welcome to my segment of the virtual refugia garden. This project will begin with a reflection of the work I did with the radiant Miss Kay Bell. Afterwards, there is a brief introduction to the context of my poem. And then, the grand poem I wrote titled “my ocean boy”. To my reader, take this work as a guidance to how you may seek refuge in feeling God’s creation and to find healing in metaphors and poetry.
Reflection
In a world where everybody strives for beauty, accomplishments, and overall self-improvement; it is normal for humans to get lost in oneself. This natural self-absorption makes humans disregard the world around them- the environment being the perfect example of this. Littering, rising sea levels and climate change are often disregarded because it doesn’t directly apply to homo-sapiens until it all comes crashing down. So, humanity must concentrate on habits that are helpful to the earth. But to do this, humanity must rewire their brain out of self-absorption- and it doesn’t have to be a negative thing. My work alongside SCRAP was a peaceful escape outside of my life, ultimately making me more mindful of the world around me.
I worked for Kay Bell’s Global Revive alongside Isabella, Olivia, and Madison. Upon first arriving to the site, I was met with pretty pollinator beds that had been painted and decorated for space for the plants to have a beautiful home. It was obvious that a lot of care and effort was put into Kay Bell’s garden- for every plant was laid out on the pollinator bed symmetrically and every plant had begun to grow. This gave me some anxiety because I was worried that if I had done something wrong, I would have messed up all the hard work she had put henceforth in this garden.
Kay Bell herself was watering all her plants. She looked as if she was at peace, surrounded by her garden of hard work. I admired that about Kay Bell. It takes a strong urge of generativity to give up time and work to attend a garden so her community can have access to healthy fruits and vegetables. She had instructed Madison, Isabella, Olivia and I to shovel up compost into tires and then paint the tires. And thus, our journey began to assist Global Revive.
We had a couple of shovels, a wheelbarrow, and gloves. I was grateful that the compost was already in a predisposed compost pile. So, our job was to shovel the compost into the wheelbarrow, wheel it over to the tires, and then bury the compost into the tires. Admittedly, this was much easier said than done. I am not a very strong person; I struggle to lift heavy things. The shovel itself was not heavy but a shovel with a load of compost was heavy. A wheelbarrow filled with compost was especially heavy. I am embarrassed to admit this, but I am also not very coordinated. So, transporting the wheelbarrow wasn’t natural- for I was balancing an entire compost load on one wheel, trying not to knock it over and spill all of the shoveled compost onto her freshly mowed grass.
After a couple of trips of compost transportation, it became natural and I began to do it quickly. Olivia had said something very kind “You’re so efficient at this” which made me smile. Empowerment towards others is the key to successful teamwork. I bonded a lot with my teammates, in which we discussed our favorite books, our classes, and enjoyed each other’s sense of humor. I had shared with them that I am a commuter student from Temple. Whenever we said our goodbyes, they made it clear to me to drive safely on my forty-minute trip home. Any exchange of kindness always makes my trips to school feel great.
After filling the tires with compost, Kay Bell handed us buckets of paint and paintbrushes and instructed us to paint the top tires with the chartreuse color and the bottom tires with baby blue. This was a fun part. We all got to sit down and enjoy the sunset as we painted tires with pretty colors. This reminded me of being a high school theater kid, painting set pieces as I made friends with my thespian troupe.
Once we had finished the job and finished admiring all the work we had completed; we were completely sweaty and in humorous concurrence that we would rush to the shower promptly after arriving home.
After this experience, I began to feel a sense of gratitude for nature around me and its functions to keep humanity alive for many centuries. Like I had mentioned earlier, it is so easy to get wrapped up in oneself. Whenever I was shoveling compost into the wheelbarrow- I was thinking about myself and how uncomfortable I was from being sweaty and feeling gross. But once I had seen the outcome of the hard work we had put in, I stopped thinking about myself and how gross I felt. This lack of self-absorption was the exact attitude I adopted whenever I attended pollinator patches- anytime I felt too tired to go to my time slot, I remembered the importance of helping others above oneself. And this is the exact attitude some must have towards the environment- that one's self-absorbed attitude may prevent joy.
Creative Invitation
Introduction
God made human emotion just like the weather. We are one with the environment.
Any feeling of sadness is closely tied to water- especially rain. This is because of tears- salty, wet tears streaming down the face is like rain pouring down to the Earth.
Feelings of anger are like thunder. Thunder is loud, chaotic, and brings all attention to itself whenever it is untamed.
Whenever the feelings are combined, a thunderstorm is created. Thunderstorms are some of the worst weathers out there. It’s difficult to drive in; children fear it, and it can set off the power of an entire building.
But,
Thunderstorms are passionate. They’re meant to be danced in and have heartfelt confessions in. They’re a first kiss moment.
However,
Thunderstorms are self-destructive. Regardless of the passion, and beautiful sight they can destroy buildings, strike lightening down on the innocent and recklessly drive into one another if people are not careful.
So, one must not get carried away in the thunderstorm. Never be blinded by the passion that came with soaking wet hair and the screaming in each other's face.
My poem is titled “My Ocean Boy” and it is a comparative poem in which I compare tumultuous love to an unsteady environment. In terms of my poem, I was greatly inspired by the garden work. Working so closely with nature causes the mind to begin to compare every aspect of one's life to the environment.
I had begun to look at all aspects of my life and to translate it into metaphors and similes that center around terrible weather and certain biomes. I begin to associate certain emotions and feelings with certain weather conditions.
Tying this into refugia, viewing the world in romanticized metaphors of the environment (just like Wordsworth's) is a perfect way to understand pain, human feelings and to build connection to any non-mammals. And with that understanding, healing begins. And that is my personal belief of what refugia is- an attempt to heal and persevere through the volcano ash
my ocean boy
your love is an ocean tide
that draws back and forth,
changing its mind everyday,
all descending into a hurricane
to which i’d run towards everyday.
wind in my hair,
i would chase that current,
sink in the deep end,
let the saltwater fill my lungs.
for you,
i’d dance on a stormy beach,
let the sharks chase me
and let the sirens possess me.
i’ll die from a slow burn frustration,
backstroke into a front facing mistake
once again
just to see his thunderstorm stare.
the attraction is an ocean tide,
that somehow always returns-
regardless of what the wind was doing.
you are supernatural like that.
can somehow create a storm on a sunny day.
i saw a golden skyline and it reminded me of us,
for i am the golden sunrise
that will end your violet night.
i am the saltwater that will fill your lungs,
i am the deep end you’ll dive into,
i am the all encompassing love
that you
refuse to have.
Works Consulted
“William Wordsworth | The Poetry Foundation.” The Poetry Foundation, www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/william-wordsworth. Accessed 15 Dec. 2025.